Ian Dunbar:友好的狗訓練

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http://dotsub.com/view/81d21886-ed03-48f1-a6a1-502e953752ec
Ian Dunbar:友好的狗訓練
狗是有喜好的 它们喜欢相互嗅探，追逐松鼠。 要是我们不把它们的喜好作为训练过程中的奖赏，那这些喜好就会让它们分心。 这样的一个想法常使我震撼。 如果公园里有一只狗，它的主人在叫它。 主人说：“狗狗，过来，来这儿。” 狗心想：“嗯，有意思。 我正在嗅另一只狗的屁股，主人也在喊我。 这真是为难我。”是吧？ 屁股，主人 —— （当然）屁股赢了。 是的，你输了。 要是你是一只青春期的狗， 你是没法和环境抗衡的。 所以，当我们训练狗的时候，我们一直试图 站在狗的角度思考。
今天我在这里（演讲）主要是因为 目前对狗的训练方法中存在分歧 —— 一方面，有这样一些人，认为训练狗 首先要制定规矩，人类的规矩。 我们不考虑狗是怎么想的。 所以这些人会说：“你要这么做，该死的（狗）。 我们要强迫你去做违背你意愿的事情，要屈从于我们的意愿。” 第二，我们这些规矩对狗来说是保密的。 第三，我们可以惩罚狗， 如果它违反了它根本就不知道的规矩。 如果你有一只小狗，它奔向你 —— 它唯一的错就是它长大了。 当它还是个小狗的时候，它把爪子放到你腿上， 你感觉很好吧？ 你会说:“哦，好孩子。” 你弯下腰，轻轻拍它，作为对它跳跃的一种奖励。 它的错误在于它是一只藏獒，几个月后， 它的体重增加到80磅（约73斤）。 每次它跳起来，它都会受到责骂。 对狗来说遭受到这些责骂是非常非常可怕的。
有关（人对狗的）控制的问题， 我们对狗的训练是把（对狗来说）非常复杂的社会性系统 当作米老鼠动画一样来草草对待。 但是狗们把这个看的非常重要。 公狗非常重视等级， 因为可以避免争斗。 当然，另一方面，和母狗们 之间的规则是在公狗的等级制度之外的。 第一原则是：“我有，你没有”， 你会发现，一只非常非常低等级的母狗 能叼着一块骨头，不让高等级公狗拿到。 所以，我们在狗的训练中引入这个等级概念， 或者说阿尔法狗（头号狗），你一定听说过。
狗被如此虐待。 狗，马和人 —— 这是三个受虐物种。 原因是在于他们的天生的行为习惯就是 永远会回头来道歉。 比如：“哦，抱歉你还得打我，真的很抱歉，这是我的错。” 他们这么经打， 这就是他们挨打的原因。 可怜的小狗跳起来，你打开关于狗的书，看看书里说什么呐？ “抓住它的前爪，使劲捏它的前爪。 踩住它的后腿，朝它脸上洒柠檬汁， 用报纸卷打它的头， 用膝盖压住它的胸部，使它做后转翻。” 就是因为它长大了？ 是因为它正在做一个你已经训练过它的动作？ 这真是不讲理。 我问狗的主人：“你希望这只狗怎么欢迎你（回家）？” 他说：“我不知道，我想应该是坐下吧”。 我说：“那让我们教它坐下。” 然后我们给它一个坐下的理由。 因为第一阶段， 是教给狗它的第二语言。 我可以对你说：“Laytay-chai, paisey, paisey ”（斯瓦希里语言）， （然后期待）接下来，应该有些反应。 你为什么没有反应？哦，你不懂斯瓦希里语。 好吧，那我告诉你， 狗也不懂什么英语，美语，西班牙语或者法语。
所以培训第一阶段是让狗学习“第二语言” —— 英语就是它的第二语言。 这就关系到我们怎么用手里的食物来引导。 我们用食物因为我们和狗主人打交道。 我妻子不需要食物，她是个好的训狗师， 比我好多了。 我不需要食物。但是一般水平的狗主人说， “狗狗，坐下。” 或者一边说：“坐下，坐下，坐下。” 同时他们在狗屁股前用手势大打出信号 好像狗那里有第三只眼睛，这没用。 （光说）“坐下，坐下”没用。 我们说 “狗狗，坐”，（然后给点吃的，） 狗狗6-10次之后就学会了。
然后我们再逐步取消食物的引导。 现在狗知道了，“坐下”的意思是坐下。 你甚至可以用完美的英语句子 跟狗沟通。 “Phoenix，过来这儿，请把这个拿过去给Jamie。” 如果我已经教会了它“Phoenix”（狗的名字）, "过来"，"拿这个"，"去”， 以及我儿子的名字“Jamie”， 狗会记住这些， 它能成为我的小搜救犬。 它可以找到Jamie，不论Jamie在哪里， 不论孩子是在溪边玩石头还是什么的， 还能带信息给他，比如 “嘿，晚饭好了，进来吃饭了”之类的。
所以，在这个角度上，狗能理解我们想要它做什么。 （问题是）它愿意做么？ 不一定。 像我前面说的，如果它在公园里，有其他的狗屁股可以嗅， 它为什么要到主人这里来？ 狗跟你住在一起，它随时可以来找你。 如果你愿意，狗想嗅你的时候也可以嗅你的屁股。 在这一刻，它在公园里，而你在和 其他气味，其他狗，和松鼠们竞争。（你肯定赢不了。）
所以训练第二阶段就是教给狗去自愿地做 那些我们想要它去做的事情。这其实很简单。 我们采用普雷马克原理（用喜欢的行为作为不喜欢的行为，来有效地强化原本不喜欢的行为）。 简单说，当狗作一个一个低频行为 —— 一个狗通常不会做的行为 —— 我们马上让它作一个高频行为，通常被称做“行为问题” 或者“狗的爱好” --狗确实喜欢做的事情。 这是让狗做这个低频行为的奖励。 比如说（我们让它）“坐”，（它照作了，就可以允许它）到沙发上来；“坐”，它照作了，就可以）挠挠它的肚皮；“坐”， （它照作了，就可以）让一个球给它；“坐”， （它照作了，就可以）让它跟其它狗打个招呼。 是的，我们把让狗“嗅屁股”也作为一个奖励。 “坐”，（它照作了，就可以跑去） 嗅屁股。
所有这些跟我们训练目标相反的，分散狗注意力的事情 都成为了对狗训练中的奖励。 我们现在做的，本质上说，是在教狗，也有点像 —— 我们让狗认为，狗在训练我们。 我能想象的出，这只狗， 透过围栏给它的Akita狗朋友（日本秋田犬）说， “哇，训练我的主人太容易了！ 他们就像金毛寻猎犬。 我只需要坐下来，他们就会（为我）做事情。 他们（为我）开门，开车带我出去，给我做按摩， 他们会扔网球给我， 他们会给我做饭，然后还把食物端过来。 就像这样，我只要一坐下，我就在发号施令了。 然后，我就有了私人门卫， 私人司机，按摩师，厨师和侍者。” 现在狗也真的很开心。 这就是我说的训练。 我们在激励狗去做想做的， 这样就不怎么需要惩罚。
现在我们开始第三阶段， 总会有些时候（你希望狗无条件地服从），你明白，那种“爸爸最知道”的时候。（美俚，意思是别问为什么，照我说的做就对了。） 我的冰箱上有个小标签写着： “因为我是老爸，这就是原因。” 抱歉，不做过多解释 —— “我是老爸，你不是，坐下。” 或者有些时候 —— 比如 我儿子的朋友没有随手关门， 狗必须知道“你不能跨出门去”。 这是生死攸关的事情。 你离了这不可侵犯的房子， 你在大街上可能被车撞。 所以有些事情我们必须让狗知道， “你绝对不能这么做。”
所以我们必须强迫，但是不能用暴力。 人们对什么是惩罚很糊涂。 他们认为惩罚必须非常暴力。 我打赌你也是这样想的，对吗？ 你认为惩罚是痛苦的，可怕的或者暴力的。 其实不一定。 惩罚有几种定义， 但是最常见的一种定义是， 惩罚是能减少前面刚刚发生的行为的一种刺激， 使得未来减少这种行为发生的可能性。 惩罚不一定是暴力的，令人害怕的或者痛苦的。 要我说，如果惩罚不是一定要这样，那么惩罚就不应该是这样。
一年前我曾经接触过一只非常危险的狗—— 这只狗把它的两个主人“送”进了医院， 还伤了主人的姐夫和孩子。 狗主人保证让它只呆在他们的房子里，不会带出来， 我才答应训练这只狗。 这只狗现在已经被安乐死了， 但是我曾经训练这只狗相当一段时间。 在厨房里这只狗常表现出很多攻击性行为。 所以当我在那里的时候-那是我第四次去拜访- 我们整整四个半小时坐着不动，狗就坐在（厨房里）它的垫子上。 狗主人命令狗保持不能动， 每当狗试图离开垫子， 她就说：“Rover，呆在垫子上，呆在垫子上，呆在垫子上。” 她做晚饭的时候，在这4个半小时里，狗曾22次打破“坐等”的命令。 因为它对食物一直有“攻击性行为”。 （当我们训练时）狗违背命令次数越来越少， 你看，惩罚正在发挥作用。 行为问题已经不见了。 她并没有提高嗓门。 如果她大声命令，狗就可能咬她。 这并不是一个你可以朝它大喊的好狗。 我很多朋友训练过很好的狗— 比如灰熊，如果你曾经在电视或电影看到过灰熊， 它是我一个朋友训练的。 虎鲸—我爱极了它。 你准备怎样去惩戒一只灰熊？ “坏熊，坏熊！”轰！ 你的头颅，划过长空，落在百米开外，对吧？ 这是疯狂的。
那么，我们怎么办？ 我们想要一个更好的方法。 我们应该对狗们更好些。 但是对我来说，这么做是为了狗。 这是在驯狗课上看人们训练小狗时， 在意识到它们和主人间不得了的互动能力， 和主人间不得了的亲密联系时有感而生的。 狗不光是和主人（有这种互动和亲密联系），和主人的家庭成员也一样（有）。 我的意思是，我常用的的是另一种意义上的“过来”的命令。 你看到公园里某个狗的主人-我会掩上我的麦克风说， 因为我不想惊扰你 -- 主人在公园里 他们的狗在那边，他们喊：“Rover, 过来， Rover 过来，Rover 过来，你个狗娘养的。” 而狗说：“我不这么认为。” （笑） 我的意思是，哪些正常人 会认为当他们那样怒吼时 狗会愿意接近他们？ 相反的，狗会说：“我知道那个语调，我知道那个语调。 上次（他用那个语调）而我过去的时候，我受到了惩罚。” （所以狗就更加不愿意过来。） （这对于人类之间的关系也适用。）有一回我正在登机 —— 对我来说，那是我职业生涯的重要时刻， 因为那一刻我决定了在驯狗这件事上 我的宗旨 —— 这个“如何用友善的方式来训练狗做我们希望的事”的概念， 这样我们就不需要强迫狗。 你知道，我用驯狗的方式“驯”我的孩子。 在那个开创性的时刻，我在飞往达拉斯的飞机上， 在第二排坐着一位父亲，和一个大约五岁的男孩， 男孩踢椅子背， （那个父亲说：）“Jonny，不要这样。” (孩子还是）踢，踢，踢。 “Jonny，不许踢。”（孩子还是）踢，踢，踢。 我就带着我的行李站在那里。 那个父亲俯下身，这样抓住男孩，面色难看。 脸色难看是这样的 —— 当你和一只狗或者一个孩子面对面， 你说：“你在干什么！现在就停下来，停，停！” 然后我走过去：“哦，天呢，我能做点什么？” 那个男孩已经懵了—— 这个世界上他能信任的两人中之一（指他父亲） 已经彻底”抛弃“他了。 我在想：“我要告诉这个蠢人不要这样做吗？” 我想：“甭管了，不管了，走吧。” 我走到飞机后舱， 我坐下来，忽然想到， 如果刚才那个场面是对一只狗，我会去把他撂倒。
（笑） 如果他踢了一只狗，我会给他一拳。 他吓了一个孩子，这样抓住孩子，我却放任不管。
这就是我想说的。 这些人际关系的技巧非常简单。（对狗和人都一样。） 我们作为人，我们寻找人生伴侣是浅薄的，就基于三点， 肤色，体型和外貌。 你看，有点像小机器人。 我们就这样开始了我们的爱情，很棒的过了大概一年， 接下来行为问题就出现了。 跟狗长大了开始叫没什么不同。 丈夫不清理衣物， 妻子约会总迟到，诸如此类的，对吧？ 这就开始啦，我们就开始（有反应）了， 我们主观的个人反馈 —— 这个问题有两方面。 当你观察人和狗或者人和人之间的互动， 一个是太少反馈，太少了。 （第二个是）当一旦有反馈时，（这些反馈又是）非常糟糕的，非常暴力的。 尤其是发生在家庭中，发生在配偶之间， 发生在孩子和父母之间。 在工作场合你也能看到这种情况， 特别是老板对待员工。 说起来有点幸灾乐祸的味道 —— 我们实际上以别人犯错为乐， 这样我们才能悲叹，抱怨和辱骂他们。
这个，依我看，是我们人类最大的弱点。 真的是这样。 我们认为好的是理所当然，悲叹和抱怨不好的。 我认为这个（奖励好的行为的）概念，这个处理所有人际关系的技巧，应该（在学校里）教 —— 当然，（通常在学校里教的那些课，比如）微积分是非常棒的。 我是个算数神童。 我现在不行了，但是我小时候可以做得很好。 （再比如）几何，棒极了，量子力学 —— 这些都很酷。 但是这些课不能（帮你）挽救婚姻，不能培养孩子。
我对未来的展望是， 我想做的整个“狗事情”就是要告诉大家， 驯夫其实很容易。 可能更容易些 —— 要是你有一只狗像Rotty（上面提到的难驯的狗）那样，（你的丈夫）驯起来要容易得多。 你的孩子们也容易驯。 你所要做的就是观察他们， 定时观察（他们的）行为，比如，每隔五分钟， 你问自己：“（他们的表现）是好， 还是坏？” 如果他们表现好，你就（对他们）说：“（你做的）非常好，谢谢。” 这是一个非常强大的训练技巧。 我们应该在学校里教（学生这个技巧）。 人际关系 —— 你如何沟通？ 你该如何跟一个想要你的玩具的朋友沟通？ 你该怎么准备你的第一段感情？ 究竟应该如何抚养孩子？ 我们觉得我们知道怎么做 —— 结果有一晚上， 我们怀孕了， 然后我们就要抚养生命中最重要的东西 —— 孩子。 这种（用奖励来加强好的习惯的）沟通技巧大家都应该学 —— 好的生活方式，好的习惯， 就像坏习惯一样难以改变。 这，就是我对未来的希望。 啊，见鬼，我想要准时结束（我的演讲）。 但我还有8秒，7，6，5，4，3，2 —— 谢谢大家，我的演讲到此结束，
谢谢。 掌声。
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Ian Dunbar on dog-friendly dog training
Dogs have interests. They have interests sniffing each other, chasing squirrels. And if we don't make that a reward in training, that will be a distraction. It's always sort of struck me as really a scary thought that if you see a dog in a park, and the owner is calling it, and the owner says, you know, "Puppy, come here, come here," and the dog thinks, "Hmm, interesting. I'm sniffing this other dog's rear-end, the owner's calling, it's a difficult choice." Right? Rear-end, owner -- rear-end wins. I mean, you lose. You cannot compete with the environment, if you have an adolescent dog's brain. So, when we train, we're always trying to take into account the dog's point of view.

Now, I'm here largely because there's kind of a rift in dog training at the moment -- that on one side, we have people who think that you train a dog, number one, by making up rules, human rules. We don't take the dog's point of view into account. So the human says, "You're going to act this way, damn it. We're going to force you to act against your will, to bend to our will." Then, number two -- we keep these rules a secret from the dog. And then number three -- now we can punish the dog for breaking rules he didn't even know existed. So you get a little puppy, he comes -- his only crime is he grew. When he was a little puppy, he puts his paws on your leg -- you know, isn't that nice? And you go, "Oh, there's a good boy." You bend down, you pat him -- you reward him for jumping up. His one mistake is he's a Tibetan mastiff, and a few months later he weighs, you know, 80 pounds. Every time he jumps up, he gets all sorts of abuse. I mean, it is really very, very scary the abuse that dogs get.

So, this whole dominance issue -- number one, what we get in dog training is this Mickey-Mouse interpretation of a very complicated social system. And they take this stuff seriously. Male dogs are very serious about a hierarchy, because it prevents physical fights. Of course, female dogs -- bitches -- on the other hand, have several bitch amendments to male hierarchical rule. The number one is, "I have it, you don't." And what you will find is, a very, very low-ranking bitch will quite easily keep a bone away from a high-ranking male. So, we get in dog training this notion of dominances, or of the alpha dog -- I'm sure that you've heard this.

Dogs get so abused. Dogs, horses, and humans -- these are the three species which are so abused in life. And the reason is, built into their behavior is to always come back and apologize. Like, "Oh, I'm sorry you had to beat me, I'm really sorry, yes, it's my fault." They are just so beatable. And that's why they get beaten. The poor puppy jumps up, you open the dog book, what does it say? "Hold his front paws, squeeze his front paws, stamp on his hind feet, squirt him in the face with lemon juice, hit him on the head with a rolled-up newspaper, knee him in the chest, flip him over backwards." Because he grew? And because he's performing a behavior you've trained him to do? This is insanity. I ask owners, "Well, how would you like the dog to greet you?" And people say, "Well, I don't know, to sit, I guess." I said, "Let's teach him to sit." And then we give him a reason for sitting. Because the first stage is basically teaching a dog ESL. I could speak to you and say, "Laytay-chai, paisey, paisey." Go on, something should happen now. Why aren't you responding? Oh, you don't speak Swahili. Well, I've got news for you. The dog doesn't speak English, or American, or Spanish, or French.

So the first stage in training is to teach the dog ESL -- English as a second language. And that's how we use the food lure in the hand, and we use food because we're dealing with owners. My wife doesn't need food -- she's a great trainer, much better than I am. I don't need food, but the average owner says, "Puppy, sit." Or they go, "Sit, sit, sit." They're making a hand signal in front of the dog's rectum for some reason, like the dog has a third eye there -- it's insane. You know, "Sit, sit." No, we go, "Puppy, sit" -- boom, it's got it in six to 10 trials.

Then we phase out the food as a lure, and now the dog knows that "sit" means sit, and you can actually communicate to a dog in a perfectly-constructed English sentence. "Phoenix, come here, take this, and go to Jamie, please." And I've taught her "Phoenix," "come here," "take this," "go to," and the name of my son, "Jamie." And the dog can take a note, and I've got my own little search-and-rescue dog. He'll find Jamie wherever he is, you know, wherever kids are, crushing rocks by a stream or something, and take him a little message that says, "Hey, dinner's ready. Come in for dinner."

So, at this point, the dog knows what we want it to do. Will it do it? Not necessarily, no. As I said, if he's in the park and there's a rear-end to sniff, why come to the owner? The dog lives with you, the dog can get you any time, the dog can sniff your butt, if you like, when he wants to. At the moment, he's in the park, and you are competing with smells, and other dogs, and squirrels.

So the second stage in training is to teach the dog to want to do what we want him to do, and this is very easy. We use the Premack principle. Basically, we follow a low-frequency behavior -- one the dog doesn't want to do -- by a high-frequency behavior, commonly known as a "behavior problem," or a "dog hobby" -- something the dog does like to do. That will then become a reward for the lower-frequency behavior. So we go, "sit," on the couch, "sit," tummy-rub, "sit," look, I throw a tennis ball, "sit," say hello to that other dog. Yes, we put "sniff butt" on queue. "Sit," sniff butt.

So now all of these distractions that worked against training now become rewards that work for training. And what we're doing, in essence, is we're teaching the dog, kind of like -- -- we're letting the dog think that the dog is training us. And I can imagine this dog, you know, speaking through the fence to, say, an Akita, saying, "Wow, my owners, they are so incredibly easy to train. They're like Golden Retrievers. All I have to do is sit, and they do everything. They open doors, they drive my car, they massage me, they will throw tennis balls, they will cook for me and serve the food. It's like, if I just sit, that's my command. Then I have my own personal doorman, chauffeur, masseuse, chef and waiter." And now the dog's really happy. And this, to me, is always what training is. So we really motivate the dog to want to do it, such that the need for punishment seldom comes up.

Now we move to phase three, when now -- there's times, you know, when Daddy knows best. And I have a little sign on my fridge, and it says, "Because I'm the Daddy, that's why." Sorry, no more explanation -- "I'm the daddy, you're not, sit." And there's times -- for example, if my son's friends leave the door open, the dogs have to know you don't step across this line. This is a life-or-death thing. You leave this, the sanctity of your house, and you could be hit on the street. So some things we have to let the dog know, "You mustn't do this."

And so we have to enforce, but without force. People here get very confused about what a punishment is. They think a punishment is something nasty. I bet a lot of you do, right? You think it's something painful, or scary, or nasty. It doesn't have to be. There's several definitions of what a punishment is, but one definition, the most popular, is -- A punishment is a stimulus that reduces the immediately-preceding behavior, such that it's less likely to occur in the future. It does not have to be nasty, scary or painful. And I would say, if it doesn't have to be, then maybe it shouldn't be.

I was working with a very dangerous dog about a year ago -- and this was a dog that put both his owners in hospital, plus the brother-in-law, plus the child. And I only agreed to work with it if they promised it would stay in their house, and they never took it outside. The dog is actually euthanized now, but this was a dog I worked with for a while. A lot of the aggression happened around the kitchen, so while I was there -- this was on the fourth visit -- we did a four and a half hour down-stay, with the dog on his mat. And he was kept there by the owner's calm insistence. When the dog would try to leave the mat, she would say, "Rover, on the mat, on the mat, on the mat." The dog broke his down-stay 22 times in four and a half hours while she cooked dinner, because we had a lot of aggression related towards food. The breaks got fewer and fewer. You see, the punishment was working. The behavior problem was going away. She never raised her voice. If she did, she would have got bitten. It's not a good dog you shout at. And a lot of my friends train really neat animals -- grizzly bears, if you've ever seen a grizzly bear on the telly or in film, then it's a friend of mine who's trained it. Killer whales -- I love it because it wires you up. How are you going to reprimand a grizzly bear? "Bad bear, bad bear!" Voom! Your head now is 100 yards away, sailing through the air, OK? This is crazy.

So, where do we go from here? We want a better way. Dogs deserve better. But for me, the reason for this actually has to do with dogs, it has to do with watching people train puppies, and realizing they have horrendous interaction skills, horrendous relationship skills. Not just with their puppy, but with the rest of the family at class. I mean, my all-time classic is another "come here" one. You see someone in the park -- and I'll cover my mic when I say this, because I don't want to wake you up -- and there's the owner in the park, and their dog's over here, and they say, "Rover, come here. Rover, come here. Rover, come here, you son of a bitch." The dog says, "I don't think so." (Laughter) I mean, who in their right mind would think that a dog would want to approach them when they're screaming like that? Instead, the dog says, "I know that tone, I know that tone. Previously when I've approached, I've got punished there." I was walking onto a plane -- this, for me, was a pivotal moment in my career, and it really cemented what I wanted to do with this whole puppy-training thing -- the notion of how to teach puppies in a dog-friendly way to want to do what we want to do, so we don't have to force them. You know, I puppy-train my child. And the seminal moment was, I was getting on a plane in Dallas, and in row two was a father, I presume, and a young boy about five, kicking the back of the chair. "Johnny, don't do that." Kick, kick, kick. "Johnny, don't do that." Kick, kick, kick. I'm standing right here with my bag. The father leans over, grabs him like this and gives him ugly-face. And ugly-face is this -- when you go face-to-face with a puppy or a child, you say, "What are you doing! Now stop it, stop it, stop it!" And I went, "Oh my God, do I do something?" That child has lost everything -- that one of the two people he can trust in this world has absolutely pulled the rug from under his feet. And I thought, "Do I tell this jerk to quit it?" I thought, "Ian, stay out of it, stay out of it, you know, walk on." I walked to the back of the plane I sat down, and a thought came to me. If that had been a dog, I would have laid him out. (Laughter) If he had kicked a dog, I would have punched him out. He kicked a child, grabs the child like this and I let it go.

And this is what it's all about. These relationship skills are so easy. I mean, we as humans, our shallowness when we choose a life-mate based on the three Cs -- coat color, conformation, cuteness. You know, kind of like a little robot. This is how we go into a relationship, and it's hunky-dory for a year. And then a little behavior problem comes up. No different from the dog barking. The husband won't clear up his clothes, or the wife's always late for meetings, whatever it is, OK? And it then starts, and we get into this thing, and our personal feedback -- there's two things about it. When you watch people interacting with animals or other people, there is very little feedback, it's too infrequent. And when it happens, it's bad, it's nasty. You see, it's especially in families, especially with spouses, especially with children, especially with parents. You see it especially in the workplace, especially from boss to employee. It's as if there's some schadenfreude there -- that we actually take delight in people getting things wrong, so that we can then moan and groan and bitch at them.

And this, I would say, is the biggest human foible that we have. It really is. We take the good for granted, and we moan and groan at the bad. And I think this whole notion of these skills should be taught -- you know, calculus is wonderful. When I was a kid, I was a calculus whiz. I don't understand a thing about it now, but I could do it as a kid. Geometry, fantastic, you know, quantum mechanics -- these are cool things. But they don't save marriages and they don't raise children.

And my look to the future is, and what I want to do with this doggy stuff, is to teach people that you know, your husband's just as easy to train. Probably easier -- if you got a Rotty, much easier to train. Your kids are easy to train. All you've got to do is to watch them, to time-sample the behavior, and say, every five minutes, you ask the question, "Is it good, or is it bad?" If it's good, say, "That was really neat, thank you." That is such a powerful training technique. This should be taught in schools. Relationships -- how do you negotiate? How you do negotiate with your friend who wants your toy? You know, how to prepare you for your first relationship? How on earth about raising children? We think how we do it -- one night in bed, we're pregnant, and then we're raising the most important thing in life -- a child. No, this is what should be taught -- the good living, the good habits, which are just as hard to break as bad habits. So, that would be my wish to the future. Ah, damn, I wanted to end exactly on time, but I got eight, seven, six, five, four, three, two -- so thank you very much, that's my talk, thank you. (Applause)